7 Sins To Online Dating
Most of you reading this will have been on at least a few or a
few hundred Online dates. And, with millions of people dating Online,
sifting through all the thousands of profiles to find your perfect
match can be quite a challenge. The key is in dating smart and making
your profile stand out from all the others. Read below, my little love
disciples. Are you committing one of the seven deadly sins of Online
dating?
Sin
#1: Thou
Shalt Not Wear Chartreuse
Many color experts believe that chartreuse (yellowish-green) is one
color that actually repels both men and women. So, even if you're the
rare person who looks good in fluorescent Slurpee-green, don't wear it
in your photos or on your date. You're not doing yourself any favors.
Sin #2: Thou
Shalt Not Forget To Post a Photo
It's a fact. Profiles that include photos get eight times the response.
It's also important to remember that lots of people won't even consider
dating someone without a photo. Pictures are the quickest way to show
off your looks and your personality, and crank up your Online dating
odds.
Be sure your photo is up-to-date: since physical attraction
is a big part of love, you want to find someone who's attracted to you
right now. Not someone who is attracted to you 15 pounds lighter and
seven years younger. With different hair. And one less tattoo.
And, when you're looking at other people's profiles, remember to
consider the entire package before making a snapshot judgment.
Shoshanna Rikon, New York City's top Jewish matchmaker says,
"Oftentimes a person looks much better in person than in a photo."
Jeez, I hope so.
Sin #3: Thou Shalt Not
Give Out Too Much Personal Information
Robert Siciliano CEO of ID Theft Security.com says "Online dating is
the textbook definition of the blind date. The biggest mistakes people
make are giving out their first and last name, and then giving out
their home or cell phone number. With these pieces of information,
anyone can find out where you live and have enough data to compromise
your identity. The Internet has made it extremely easy for a person to
be searched via home phone, cell phone and name." He says,
"Purposefully or inadvertently giving out a home address is never a
good idea until you are positive this is a sane person you want to
spend time with. If you're going to give a phone number, give out a
non-traceable number." Services such as myprivateline.com can make it
easier to keep your personal information to yourself.
Also, make sure that you meet your date at a public place, tell someone
where you're going and take a cell phone and your own car. Another word
to the wise -- if you have children, it is a bad idea to post
photographs of them with your profile, or email them later on. It's
just not safe.
Sin #4: Thou
Shalt Not Search For An Exact Duplicate of Yourself (Thyself?)
Some common interests are great, but don't insist your personalities be
matchy-matchy. It shouldn't be a requirement that you find someone who
loves all of the same things you do. Why? Even a classics-loving,
vegetarian cyclist can find happiness with a hard rock ballad-crazy,
romance novel-reading steak lover. As long as you have shared values
and your personalities click, your Sunday evening activity preference
isn't nearly so important. Rikon says, "Stop putting too much
importance on a person's listed hobbies." She suggests, "It's all about
chemistry when you meet. Men and women usually have very different
types of hobbies."
Relationship coach Toni Colman warns against, "using laundry
lists of interests and activities. Not only do these bore and overwhelm
the reader, they say nothing about the writer. They can also make the
writer appear to be inflating themselves."
Sin #5: Thou
Shalt not Lie
Ah, the biggest of all dating sins. The problem with saying
you're 27 when you're 47, claiming you look like Rob Lowe when you
really look like Rob Reiner, or bragging that you own the building when
you're actually the janitor, is that once you meet in person, you're
exposed. Not only will you lose out on the person who is really
searching for the 27-year-old, real-estate mogul, Rob Lowe look-alike,
you'll also likely miss out on the person who's looking for a mature,
Rob Reiner-ish guy who's handy around the house. You'll never find the
perfect person for you if you're pretending to be someone else.
April Masini, author of Date Out Of Your League suggests,
"Never overstate your background or qualifications, it can come back to
haunt you. You want to start a new relationship on solid ground. If you
don't want to reveal every detail about yourself at this time, that's
fine, but don't exaggerate or lie about things. Just as you should be
honest, expect the same from your date. If they are evasive or seem to
be holding back on questions you have, don't be afraid to push a little
for more satisfying answers."
Sin #6: Thou
Shalt Not Eliminate a Potential Date Solely Based On a Bad Phone Call
You meet Online, you whip out a few intriguing emails, and when you're
buzzing with anticipation, you schedule that first magical phone call.
And it's, um, odd. Suddenly, you don't have as much to talk about.
Where have all the sparks gone? One telephone conversation and you've
hit the skids? Never fear, and go ahead and make that date anyway.
Rikon says, "Men don't give good phone conversation. They don't usually
like to chit-chat as much as women do... so don't read too much into a
bad phone call."
Sin #7: Thou Shalt Not
Cancel a First Date
Now, this isn't to say you can't turn down a first date, and then go on
to have a great date at another time. If you already have plans,
there's no need to break them for Mr. or Miss Possibly Fabulous unless
you really want to. However, if you make a date, then break it, your
date is inclined to believe that something better came along or that
you just weren't interested. Yet another reason not to cancel a first
date: Most people won't give you a second chance, they'll move on.
According to Rikon, "That sends the message to the other person that
you are just not that into them."
Are you guilty of committing a few Online dating sins? Well, don't beat
yourself up about it. Just confess your indiscretions to your favorite
dating expert, make some corrections in your game plan and all will be
forgiven. The beautiful thing about Online dating is that you get a
fresh start every day.
Article Courtesy of : Match.com
